Hellllllooooooooooo cheap sheepers!!!!! Not to be mistaken with cheap sneepers. If you're confused you should google it. It's fucking great. Just put sneepers in the google line there. No need to put cheap in it. Ezra here attempting to type my first blog while trying not to get distracted by my hetero life mate Frankie. He's trying to put every interesting thing on tv right now when we're both suppose to be blaaahhhhggging. Now I know what you're thinking. You could use a snack while reading my interesting blog. It's cool. I'll wait...............................Hey you're back. Did you get popcorn? That's my go to snack. It's May again and what that means is summer is approaching fast. That means America will be getting ready for the beach, baseball games, and barbecue. Although I do love getting sand in my butt cheeks, eating over priced hot dogs ($9 hot dogs? You have got to be fucking kidding me!), and burning my steaks, I will be looking forward to the Summer Blockbusters! Look at that. I just mentioned the title of my blog. You don't see that everyday. This week Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 comes out on May 4th. Que the fucking  wannabe Star Wars nerds. We will be getting our second helping of Star Lord and the gang as they run around reeking havoc in some galaxy far far away. Not only am I excited because the first one was awesome, but also because I think the original was Vin Diesels greatest performance by far. His portrayal of Groot was superb. He really had me feel for the character. If you disagree with me and say that his performance in the Pacifier was better then you sir or madam should purchase a United Airlines ticket, I don't give a shit where to, and wait for their nicest flight attendant to accommodate you . Before I move on, fun fact coming up, Jaws was the first summer blockbuster in 1975. It was during the time when the summer was considered the slow season for the cinemas. The film was shown in only 409 theaters and grossed over 7 million dollars over the weekend. That's over 32 million dollars at today's rate. In the end of its theatrical release, Jaws made over 470 million bucks. Did you know that one? Neither did I. Thank Bob for Google. See my blogs can be fun and educational. In just a few short weeks we will be getting the 5th and final installment of Pirates of the Caribbean. Fuck, Disney really does know how to bleed a franchise dry. I've seen every single one so far just because I have a weird thing for finishing a franchise once I've started them. It's an illness really. It's the reason why I have to go watch the 8th Fast and the Furious movie. Please Universal, for the love of Paul Walker, stop making these fucking movies! The Rock (it's his b day today.) is one of my favorite people to watch but damn enough is enough. Anyways back to Pirates, in this one Captain Jack Sparrow seems to be missing and Disney looks to be going back to the well here by not only bringing back the creepy ass ghost but also Orlando Bloom and Kiera Knightly. I have no idea where the hell these two have been since the third pirates film but Disney was able to fish them out of whatever hole they were hiding in. Other big movies that are coming this summer is Wonder Woman, Cars 3, and Spider-Man Homecoming. There's more but the list is long as shit and why would I want to take your joy away from googling it? Well my friends it seems it is time to let you guys go for now. Take in everything that I have told you and use it in your everyday lives. Don't take no for an answer and every once in awhile, tell someone who needs it, to fuck off. It'll feel good. Till next week my people, I'm Ezra and you were just in my blog.

Ezra the Shepard